Snoring and a roaring

 

This was my life. For nine whole months, this was my life. Who was I kidding?

 

I should have taken my own warning from the get go. I should have stuck with the first 30 day challenge. I should have turned around and walked away when I had the chance. I should have deleted that number, erased those pictures, pretended you didn't exist in my world. I should have saved my time for something greater.

 

Thing is though-

 

I didnt want to listen to those warnings. I hated that 30 day challenge. I loved being in your arms, how could I walk away from that? I couldnt delete that number, I memorized it instead. Those pictures- I love every single on of them. You were my world. Those moments I shared with you, were some of the greatest moments of my life.

 

I now find myself in such debate over what to do. Am I supposed to stick around and play this waiting game? Do I move on to something that will make me happy, something that has been staring me in my face this whole time? How do I give up the greatest love of my entire life without a fight? One year ago today, you fought for me- and won. I can feel it slipping away. Slowly, but surely it moves further away than it was yesterday. The question is though- am I up for this fight?